


Lotho's Obstacle Course

by Aria_Breuer



Category: The Lord of the Rings (Movies), The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Gen, Inspired by Disney's Even Stevens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-05
Updated: 2017-04-05
Packaged: 2018-10-15 00:56:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10547290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aria_Breuer/pseuds/Aria_Breuer
Summary: Lotho Sackville-Baggins has come up with the perfect ploy: an obstacle course of his making! Surely, it will be enough to convince Frodo Baggins that his family should own Bag End… or maybe not.Inspired by Disney's "Even Stevens" song "Masters of the Gym".





	

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimers:** I do not own _The Lord of the Rings_. J.R.R. Tolkien does.
> 
> I know. This is so evil. Well, let’s just see what happens. Shall we? :)

Lotho Sackville-Baggins, a curly brown haired hobbit with an evil grin on his face, stood out on a grassy green hill. A tall oak tree stood on the area, and before it was an obstacle course of his own making. There were tan ropes that broke apart when climbed up on. Wooden wheels that were filled with muck and green slime. And shrews in shades of brown and tan that wouldn’t stop squeaking. Lotho smiled at his work. Now everything was in order…

Oh! There they were: the brown-haired hobbits Frodo Baggins, with his blue eyes, Samwise Gamgee, with his gardener skills, and Merry Brandybuck, with his knack for boats, maps and horses. There was also the golden-haired hobbit Pippin Took, whose love for mischief with his cousin Merry held no bounds. But Lotho wasn’t interested in bounds for frolicks. No. This time, he was interested in getting Frodo back and taking over Bag End for himself! Muahahahahah! Sorry, that’s for the prank.

“Why is the Narrator ruining everything?” Lotho croaked, annoyed beyond belief. “Why don’t you take a hike, Narrator?” Just watch it, Lotho! “NOOOOO!”

“Something wrong, Lotho?” Frodo asked, grinning.

“Well, here’s my obstacle course, which you won’t beat. Now have at it!” Lotho told him, shoving the hobbit forward. Cheeky, blue eyed hobbit. He would…

“Did you just insult me, Lotho?” Frodo asked his rival.

“No! Let’s get to it! Ha ha!” Lotho blasted with little remorse.

“I think he’s eaten one too many pickled eggs,” Pippin whispered aloud to Merry.

…

The obstacle course took place. Frodo ended up falling due to the snapping ropes. Merry and Pippin were caught in the slime pits that made up those wheels. And Sam was stuck fighting off the ginormous shrews that wouldn’t stop leaving him alone. Oh yes, it was all part of Lotho’s grand scheme to…

“Leave me alone, Narrator! I’ve got this!” Lotho said with pride.

Well, excuse the Narrator for…

“That’s enough of that,” Lotho said, pushing the white board out of the way to show his obstacle course. He told Frodo and his friends. “Yes, now keep working. The winner gets Bag End. Ha ha!”

“You’re not getting Bag End,” Frodo said, moving a lock of brown hair out of his eyes.

“Says who? I own Bag End!” Lotho spat out and into Frodo’s face. “Now this obstacle course you can’t beat.”

“Can you?” Pippin asked him in exchange, as he pulled himself out of the slime.

“What?” Lotho was stumped. “Narrator!”

Nope. Sorry. You’re on your own, Lotho.

“No. Wait… what?” Lotho asked, confused. He screamed. No, Frodo and his friends were attacking him. No. They were dragging him into the slime pits, and the shrews and the breaking ropes… oh! Was there no end? “NOOOO!”

…

“Ahhh!” Frodo screamed. He looked around in relief. He was inside his bedroom, complete with the rounded beige painted walls and dark oak beams, his wooden dresser and writing desk in one corner, the green plants in their decorated vases in different corners of the room, and his large bed with the white sheets, now dirty due to him sweating bullets. He smelled his clothes. He would need a bath, but then… what was a large shrew doing in his bedroom…

“Ahhhhh!” He screamed again, only to find himself wide awake and no longer asleep. He really was awake this time and with the sad notion that this was the day when he would sell Bag End to the Sackville-Bagginses. He certainly wasn’t ready for that, but it would come nonetheless. He just hoped he was prepared enough for this task. He hoped he was, but then he would miss Bag End. That he would. Still, in the end, even he had to admit something, “What a nightmare.” He lay back down on his bed, hoping, wondering, if what he had experienced in the dream world was how this whole day would feel.

He figured it would be something like it nonetheless. But even he wasn’t sure what would happen for days to come.


End file.
